Has Your Confidence Taken a Hit Lately?  Here Are 3 ways Restore It.

It happens to all of us.

• You finally took a stand for yourself and spoke your mind and it ended up in an argument and your message was not received.
• You had this great inspiration to start something new or follow one of your dreams and you realised it was going to be harder than you thought and feel discouraged.
• Someone delegated you a big project at work that is due ''yesterday'' and you are struggling to implement it.
• You rekindled with a passion, a hobby but realised you were not as good as you used to be.

All these circumstances can slowly chip our level of confidence and can put a stop to something that is really meaningful to us, preventing us from trying again, starting something new, or taking risks.

When this happens, here are 3 things to consider to bring yourself back to balance and boost your confidence.

1/ What are you letting this mean?

Most of the time, it is NOT the actual event that triggers us, it is the meaning we attribute to it.

• If I cannot finish this project in time, it means:

e.g I will be fired, I'm a failure, people will think I'm not capable

• If it doesn't work now, it means:

e.g I'm not cut for it, I will never make it work

• It is not safe to speak my mind.
• No one likes me.

The meanings, stories we tell ourselves, add the ''drama'' and urgency to the actual event we are facing and are what create an immediate negative internal response. This can manifest in the form of anxiety, overwhelm, and feeling flat or defeated.

Consider the scenarios above without any meanings. How different would the experience be?

Certainly less overwhelming.

The thing is we do this all the time, without realising it!

We create stories, read minds and deduct meaning from this which sometimes creates a lot of distress.

Did you know that the meaning you associate to these events is tightly linked to your programming, your conditioning and mirrors the set of belief systems you have acquired in your past?

If you grew up in a highly critical environment, chances are you will highly judge yourself when things will not work out rather than looking at the big picture.

If you grew up in a supportive environment where it was ok to make mistakes, to fail, where you developed a solid sense of identity, chances are these setbacks won't affect you the same way.

And if the same situation can be looked at from many angles, we can say that the meanings we associate to life events are highly subjective even though they seem so real, so true to us.

We are the only ones who create the meaning, so choose meanings that are supporting you.

The less you identify with the meaning (i.e you make the experience mean something about you) the more freedom and peace you will experience.

2/ Manage expectations

I find that as the speed of life & usage of technology increased so did the expectations we placed on ourselves (although there are still only 24h in a day and 365 days in a year).

Frustration & self-judgement often occur when our expectations exceed what is humanly possible.

• I ''should'' be able to pick this up easily.
• I have to be at this level in the next 3 months.

I witnessed people stop something because they expected to know it all or to be good at it first go.

So if your confidence has taken a hit lately, consider whether the expectations you placed on yourself about this situation were realistic in the first place.

Could it just be that you are way too hard on yourself and it is time to recalibrate?

Time to give yourself a break?

Remember, the only people who never fail are those who never try.

Rather than focusing on what it is that you can't do, focus on all you have achieved so far, and how much you have overcome.

3/ Balance your solar plexus energy

The chakra related to self-belief and confidence is the solar plexus chakra or Manipura chakra located at the stomach level, below the ribcage.

It is also the centre corresponding to our sense of identity, the ability to show up authentically, and the seat of personal power.

Chakra (cakra in Sanskrit) means “wheel” and refers to spinning energy points in your body. Each chakra has specific emotional, mental, and spiritual attributes and attaches to a major nervous plexus therefore also influencing the bodily areas (organs, glands) related to this nervous plexus. For them to function harmoniously and optimally, the flow of energy between chakras must remain open. When any one chakra becomes blocked, it can therefore disrupt the flow of energy throughout the entire body.

In summary, when this centre is in balance we trust our abilities, believe in ourselves, and can show up in this world as our true selves without worrying about what other people think. We feel comfortable in our own skin.

When this energy centre is out of balance, we experience, low self-esteem. Because our sense of identity is weakened, we may compare ourselves to others, look for approval or validation, or deep down we are motivated by proving ourselves to the world.

This Chakra has a strong influence on the digestive system and nutrient intake. When in imbalance over a long period of time, it may manifest in stomach aches, indigestions or chronic digestive illnesses.

Since the chakra system is a mind-body system, you can restore and strengthen this centre, by uncovering and releasing the false beliefs & emotional traumas that have affected your esteem and confidence.

You can also influence it through energy work and vibrations (e.g sound, light, essential oils):

- place your hand on your stomach and breathe from your belly, focusing your attention on this centre. Imagine a yellow ball of light or fire spinning. Let your intuition guide you.

- repeat empowering affirmation: e.g ''I value myself''. ''I can do this'', ''I have all I need within me''

- since this chakra is associated with the element ''fire'', walking in the sun or seating by a fire can support its energy.

P.S: You don't have to keep believing what your mind is telling you especially if it is bullying you and putting you down.

If you want to feel more empowered, fill your cup of self-worth and uncover blocks & unconscious beliefs that prevent you to show up as your authentic self, I invite to book a 30min FREE discovery session so you can be clear on what specific roadblocks are on your way and map the journey ahead.

Click HERE to book a time.